


things you said when we were the happiest we ever were

by WitchyBee



Series: things you said... [5]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-22
Updated: 2015-02-22
Packaged: 2018-03-14 13:39:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3412673
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WitchyBee/pseuds/WitchyBee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lavellan gives him a questioning look. "What? You’re staring at me."</p><p>"It is merely that...you are so beautiful. How can I truly be this fortunate?"</p>
            </blockquote>





	things you said when we were the happiest we ever were

They lie together on the couch in the rotunda, Lavellan cuddled up close beside him while Solas reads to her from a book that was, at the time of its publication several ages ago, groundbreaking research in the field of elgarology: _A Guide to Benevolent Spirits_ by Anonymous.

“‘Love,’” he reads aloud. “‘A gentle spirit rarely glimpsed on this side of the Veil. Though most commonly associated with romantic love, any platonic bond strong enough also has the potential to call it. The kindhearted spirit seeks nothing for its own gain. Unlike its demonic counterparts, Love’s purpose is to facilitate and strengthen emotional connections in others. It is perhaps the most tenacious spirit you could ever have the fortunate to meet. But do not mistake Love's idealistic nature for naivety; people have killed and waged wars in its name since time immemorial. It has witnessed the best and worst of mortals. When it does foray into the mortal world, Love usually appears in the guise of a young woman. You would do well to heed her advice in matters of the heart.’”

Lavellan sighs contentedly, fast asleep. He smiles and presses a kiss to her forehead.

"Pleasant dreams, vhenan," he whispers.

Solas shuts the book quietly, setting it aside. He pulls Lavellan closer—feels her warm and real against him—and drifts off to sleep. They will find each other in the Fade, where things are easier.

Love has observed everything. Coy glances and quick words. Stolen kisses in the Fade. Confessions offered, but never the truth that would absolve his guilt (Liar, trickster, betrayer, deceiver, harellan.) The unexpected relief of not being alone anymore. Solas relearning how to share his burdens. 

Sometimes he forgets, for a moment, and the tension ebbs away until there’s just the easy joy of two people in love.

Tonight Solas shows his vhenan Tarasyl’an Te’las in its heyday. It is, after all, an ancient fortress whose halls he’s walked countless times in centuries past. Death, joy, hope, and salvation—all were wrought here through the ages. Yet while she marvels at history unfolding, his eyes focus only on her.

"I had no idea Skyhold was once so—" Lavellan gives him a questioning look. "What? You’re staring at me."

"It is merely that...you are so beautiful. How can I truly be this fortunate?"

"Well, this _is_ a dream. Maybe none of it’s real. A debate we should definitely have at some point, by the way."

"Ah." Solas looks away.

"Ir abelas. That actually sounded a lot more romantic in my head somehow." Lavellan draws nearer, cupping his cheek in her hand, and says, "I’m here, all right? And I promise I’ll still be there when you wake up. Ar lath ma."

"Ar lath ma, vhenan."

 _How long has it been since you let yourself be happy, Fen'Harel?_ Love thinks.

It’s frighteningly simple to fall for her. To lose himself in the lie. To become Solas, unassuming apostate/arcane adviser for the Inquisition. The best deceptions are not entirely false, and so he folds as much of his real nature into the disguise as he can,.wishing it were all true.

There is selfishness even in this, he knows, but he cannot deny himself. Solas is undeserving of her trust, let alone her affection. He treasures every second spent in her company, every loving look, because it could be the last.

Love watches all of this, drawn in by the moment’s warmth. The Fade holds an imprint of their brief time together that will remain long after they’re gone. But all things of the mortal world are fleeting, and eventually their memories will be little more than images without context—impressions for curious spirits to ponder.

**Author's Note:**

> Elgarology is a term for the study of spirits that I made up. I used the Elvish prefix because, let's be honest, Solas probably at least coined this term, if not pioneered the whole field.


End file.
